There seems to be so near an affinity betwixt wisdom, philosophy, and good counsels, that it is rather matter of curiosity than of profit to divide them; philosophy, being only a limited wisdom; and good counsels a communication of that wisdom, for the good of others, as well as of ourselves; and to posterity, as well as to the present. The wisdom of the ancients, as to the government of life, was no more than certain precepts, what to do and what not: and men were much better in that simplicity; for as they came to be more learned, they grew less careful of being good. That plain and open virtue is now turned into a dark and intricate science; and we are taught to dispute rather than to live. So long as wickedness was simple, simple remedies also were sufficient against it; but now it has taken root, and spread, we must make use of stronger.
Wisdom, philosophy, and good advice are so closely related that separating them is more interesting than useful. Philosophy is just limited wisdom. Good advice is sharing that wisdom to help others and ourselves, both now and for future generations. The ancient wisdom about how to live was simply a set of rules about what to do and what not to do. People were much better off with that simplicity. As they became more educated, they cared less about being good. That straightforward, honest virtue has now become a dark and complicated science. We're taught to argue rather than to live well. When wickedness was simple, simple solutions worked against it. But now it has taken root and spread everywhere. We must use stronger measures.
There are some dispositions that embrace good things as soon as they hear them; but they will still need quickening by admonition and precept. We are rash and forward in some cases, and dull in others; and there is no repressing of the one humor, or raising of the other, but by removing the causes of them; which are (in one word) false admiration and false fear.
Some people naturally embrace good ideas when they hear them. But they still need encouragement through advice and guidance. We act rashly and impulsively in some situations, and slowly in others. The only way to control our rash behavior or motivate our sluggish responses is to address their root causes. These causes boil down to two things: false admiration and false fear.
Every man knows his duty to his country, to his friends, to his guests; and yet when he is called upon to draw his sword for the one, or to labor for the other, he finds himself distracted betwixt his apprehensions and his delights: he knows well enough the injury he does his wife in the keeping of a wench, and yet his lust overrules him: so that it is not enough to give good advice, unless we can take away that which hinders the benefit of it. If a man does what he ought to do, he will never do it constantly or equally, without knowing why he does it: and if it be only chance or custom, he that does well by chance, may do ill so too. And farther, a precept may direct us what we ought to do, and yet fall short in the manner of doing it: an expensive entertainment may, in one case be extravagance or gluttony, and yet a point of honor and discretion in another. Tiberius Cæsar had a huge mullet presented him, which he sent to the market to be sold: “and now,” says he, “my masters,” to some company with him, “you shall see that either Apicius or Octavius will be the chapman for this fish.” Octavius beat the price, and gave about thirty pounds sterling for it. Now, there was a great difference between Octavius, that bought it for his luxury, and the other that purchased it for a compliment to Tiberius. Precepts are idle, if we be not first taught what opinion we are to have of the matter in question; whether it be poverty, riches, disgrace, sickness, banishment, etc. Let us therefore examine them one by one; not what they are called, but what in truth they are. And so for the virtues; it is to no purpose to set a high esteem upon prudence, fortitude, temperance, justice, if we do not first know what virtue is; whether one or more; or if he that has one, has all; or how they differ.
Everyone knows their duty to their country, their friends, and their guests. But when called to fight for one or work for the other, they find themselves torn between fear and desire. A man knows well enough that keeping a mistress hurts his wife, yet his lust controls him. So it's not enough to give good advice unless we can remove what prevents people from following it. If someone does what they should do, they'll never do it consistently or well without knowing why they're doing it. If it's only chance or habit, someone who does well by chance may just as easily do wrong. A rule may tell us what we should do but fall short in explaining how to do it. An expensive dinner party might be wasteful gluttony in one case, yet a matter of honor and good judgment in another. Tiberius Caesar received a huge mullet as a gift, which he sent to market to be sold. "Now," he said to his companions, "you'll see that either Apicius or Octavius will buy this fish." Octavius won the bidding and paid about thirty pounds for it. There was a big difference between Octavius, who bought it for his own pleasure, and the other man who would have bought it as a gift for Tiberius. Rules are useless if we're not first taught what to think about the subject at hand, whether it's poverty, wealth, disgrace, sickness, exile, or anything else. Let's examine these things one by one, not by what they're called, but by what they truly are. The same goes for virtues. There's no point in valuing wisdom, courage, self-control, and justice highly if we don't first know what virtue is. Is it one thing or many? Does having one virtue mean having them all? How do they differ from each other?
Precepts are of great weight; and a few useful ones at hand do more toward a happy life than whole volumes or cautions, that we know not where to find. These salutary precepts should be our daily meditation, for they are the rules by which we ought to square our lives. When they are contracted into sentences, they strike the affections: whereas admonition is only blowing of the coal; it moves the vigor of the mind, and excites virtue: we have the thing already, but we know not where it lies. It is by precept that the understanding is nourished and augmented: the offices of prudence and justice are guided by them, and they lead us to the execution of our duties. A precept delivered in verse has a much greater effect than in prose: and those very people that never think they have enough, let them but hear a sharp sentence against avarice, how will they clap and admire it, and bid open defiance to money? So soon as we find the affections struck, we must follow the blow; not with syllogisms or quirks of wit; but with plain and weighty reason and we must do it with kindness too, and respect for “there goes a blessing along with counsels and discourses that are bent wholly upon the good of the hearer:” and those are still the most efficacious that take reason along with them; and tell us as well why we are to do this or that, as what we are to do: for some understandings are weak, and need an instructor to expound to them what is good and what is evil. It is a great virtue to love, to give, and to follow good counsel; if it does not lead us to honesty, it does at least prompt us to it. As several parts make up but one harmony, and the most agreeable music arises from discords; so should a wise man gather many acts, many precepts, and the examples of many arts, to inform his own life. Our forefathers have left us in charge to avoid three things; hatred, envy, and contempt; now, it is hard to avoid envy and not incur contempt; for in taking too much care not to usurp upon others, we become many times liable to be trampled upon ourselves. Some people are afraid of others, because it is possible that others may be afraid of them: but let us secure ourselves upon all hands; for flattery is as dangerous as contempt. It is not to say, in case of admonition, I knew this before, for we know many things, but we do not think of them; so that it is the part of a monitor, not so much to teach as to mind us of our duties. Sometimes a man oversees that which lies just under his nose; otherwhile he is careless, or pretends not to see it: we do all know that friendship is sacred, and yet we violate it; and the greatest libertine expects that his own wife should be honest.
Good principles carry great weight. A few useful ones at hand do more for a happy life than whole volumes of warnings that we can't find when we need them. These helpful principles should be our daily meditation, for they are the rules by which we ought to live our lives. When they are condensed into short sayings, they strike our emotions. Advice is only like blowing on coals—it stirs up the mind's energy and awakens virtue. We already have the thing, but we don't know where it lies. Principles nourish and strengthen our understanding. They guide us in wisdom and justice, and they lead us to fulfill our duties. A principle delivered in verse has much greater effect than in prose. Even people who never think they have enough will clap and admire a sharp saying against greed, and boldly defy money when they hear it. As soon as we see emotions stirred, we must follow up. Not with complicated arguments or clever wordplay, but with plain and weighty reasoning. We must do it with kindness too, and respect, for "there goes a blessing along with advice and words that are aimed wholly at the hearer's good." The most effective counsel combines reason with instruction, telling us both why we should do something and what we should do. Some minds are weak and need a teacher to explain what is good and what is evil. It is a great virtue to love, give, and follow good advice. If it doesn't lead us to honesty, it at least prompts us toward it. Just as several parts make up one harmony, and the most pleasing music comes from discord, a wise person should gather many acts, many principles, and examples from many arts to shape their own life. Our ancestors left us instructions to avoid three things: hatred, envy, and contempt. Now, it's hard to avoid envy without earning contempt. In taking too much care not to intrude on others, we often become liable to be trampled on ourselves. Some people fear others because it's possible that others may fear them. But let us protect ourselves on all sides, for flattery is as dangerous as contempt. In the case of advice, we shouldn't say "I knew this before," for we know many things but don't think of them. So a counselor's job is not so much to teach as to remind us of our duties. Sometimes a person overlooks what lies right under their nose. Other times they are careless or pretend not to see it. We all know that friendship is sacred, yet we violate it. The greatest libertine expects his own wife to be faithful.
Good counsel is the most needful service that we can do to mankind; and if we give it to many, it will be sure to profit some: for of many trials, some or other will undoubtedly succeed. He that places a man in the possession of himself does a great thing; for wisdom does not show itself so much in precept as in life; in a firmness of mind and a mastery of appetite: it teaches us to do as well as to talk: and to make our words and actions all of a color. If that fruit be pleasantest which we gather from a tree of our own planting, how much greater delight shall we take in the growth and increase of good manners of our own forming! It is an eminent mark of wisdom for a man to be always like himself. You shall have some that keep a thrifty table, and lavish out upon building; profuse upon themselves, and forbid to others; niggardly at home, and lavish abroad. This diversity is vicious, and the effect of a dissatisfied and uneasy mind; whereas every wise man lives by rule. This disagreement of purposes arises from hence, either that we do not propound to ourselves what we would be at; or if we do, that we do not pursue it, but pass from one thing to another; and we do not only change neither but return to the very thing which we had both quitted and condemned.
Good advice is the most important service we can offer to humanity. If we share it with many people, it will surely help some of them. When we make many attempts, some are bound to succeed. When you help someone gain control of themselves, you do something truly valuable. Wisdom shows itself more in how we live than in what we preach. It appears in mental strength and self-control. Wisdom teaches us to act well, not just speak well. It helps us make our words and actions match. If fruit tastes sweetest when we pick it from a tree we planted ourselves, imagine how much greater joy we'll feel watching good character grow that we helped shape! It's a clear sign of wisdom when someone stays consistent in who they are. You'll meet people who eat simple meals but spend lavishly on buildings. They're generous with themselves but stingy with others. They pinch pennies at home but spend freely when they're out. This inconsistency is harmful and shows a restless, unsatisfied mind. Every wise person lives by clear principles. This confusion in our goals happens for two reasons. Either we don't decide what we want to become, or we do decide but don't follow through. We jump from one thing to another. We don't just change direction, we often return to the very things we once abandoned and criticized.
In all our undertakings, let us first examine our own strength; the enterprise next; and, thirdly, the persons with whom we have to do. The first point is most important; for we are apt to overvalue ourselves, and reckon that we can do more than indeed we can. One man sets up for a speaker, and is out as soon as he opens his mouth; another overcharges his estate, perhaps, or his body: a bashful man is not fit for public business: some again are too stiff and peremptory for the court: many people are apt to fly out in their anger, nay, and in a frolic too; if any sharp thing fall in their way, they will rather venture a neck than lose a jest. These people had better be quiet in the world than busy. Let him that is naturally choleric and impatient avoid all provocations, and those affairs also that multiply and draw on more; and those also from which there is no retreat. When we may come off at pleasure, and fairly hope to bring our matters to a period, it is well enough. If it so happen that a man be tied up to business, which he can neither loosen nor break off, let him imagine those shackles upon his mind to be irons upon his legs: they are troublesome at first; but when there is no remedy but patience, custom makes them easy to us, and necessity gives us courage. We are all slaves to fortune: some only in loose and golden chains, others in strait ones, and coarser: nay, and they that bind us are slaves too themselves; some to honor, others to wealth; some to offices, and others to contempt; some to their superiors, others to themselves: nay, life itself is a servitude: let us make the best of it then, and with our philosophy mend our fortune. Difficulties may be softened, and heavy burdens disposed of to our ease. Let us covet nothing out of our reach, but content ourselves with things hopeful and at hand; and without envying the advantages of others; for greatness stands upon a craggy precipice, and it is much safer and quieter living upon a level. How many great men are forced to keep their station upon mere necessity; because they find there is no coming down from it but headlong? These men should do well to fortify themselves against ill consequences by such virtues and meditations as may make them less solicitous for the future. The surest expedient in this case is to bound our desires, and to leave nothing to fortune which we may keep in our own power. Neither will this course wholly compose us, but it shows us at worst the end of our troubles.
In all our undertakings, let us first examine our own strength, then the enterprise, and finally the people we have to deal with. The first point is most important. We tend to overvalue ourselves and think we can do more than we actually can. One man tries to be a speaker but fails as soon as he opens his mouth. Another overextends his finances or his physical abilities. A shy man isn't fit for public business. Some people are too rigid and stubborn for court life. Many people lose their temper quickly, even during fun times. If they encounter something sharp or witty, they'd rather risk their neck than miss a joke. These people would be better off staying quiet in the world rather than staying busy. Let the naturally angry and impatient person avoid all provocations. They should also avoid affairs that multiply and lead to more problems, and those from which there's no retreat. When we can withdraw at will and reasonably hope to bring our matters to an end, that's fine. If it happens that a man is tied to business he can neither loosen nor break off, let him imagine those mental shackles are like irons on his legs. They're troublesome at first, but when there's no remedy except patience, habit makes them easy for us, and necessity gives us courage. We are all slaves to fortune. Some wear loose and golden chains, others wear tight and coarser ones. Even those who bind us are slaves themselves. Some serve honor, others wealth. Some serve offices, others contempt. Some serve their superiors, others themselves. Life itself is slavery. Let us make the best of it then, and use our philosophy to improve our fortune. Difficulties can be softened, and heavy burdens can be arranged for our comfort. Let us desire nothing beyond our reach. Instead, let's be content with things that are hopeful and within reach, without envying others' advantages. Greatness stands on a rocky cliff, and it's much safer and quieter to live on level ground. How many great men are forced to keep their position out of necessity because they find there's no way down except to fall headlong? These men should strengthen themselves against bad consequences through virtues and thoughts that make them less worried about the future. The surest solution in this case is to limit our desires and leave nothing to fortune that we can keep in our own power. This approach won't completely calm us, but it shows us at worst the end of our troubles.
It is but a main point to take care that we propose nothing but what is hopeful and honest. For it will be equally troublesome to us, either not to succeed, or to be ashamed of the success. Wherefore let us be sure not to admit any ill design into our heart; that we may lift up pure hands to heaven and ask nothing which another shall be a loser by. Let us pray for a good mind, which is a wish to no man’s injury. I will remember always that I am a man, and then consider, that if I am happy, it will not last always; if unhappy, I may be other if I please. I will carry my life in my hand, and deliver it up readily when it shall be called for. I will have a care of being a slave to myself; for it is a perpetual, a shameful, and the heaviest of all servitudes: and this may be done by moderate desires. I will say to myself, “What is it that I labor, sweat, and solicit for, when it is but very little that I want, and it will not be long that I will need any thing?” He that would make a trial of the firmness of his mind, let him set certain days apart for the practice of his virtues. Let him mortify himself with fasting, coarse clothes, and hard lodging; and then say to himself, “Is this the thing now that I was afraid of?” In a state of security, a man may thus prepare himself against hazards, and in plenty fortify himself against want. If you will have a man resolute when he comes to the push, train him up to it beforehand. The soldier does duty in peace, that he may be in breath when he comes to battle. How many great and wise men have made experiment of their moderation by a practice of abstinence, to the highest degree of hunger and thirst; and convinced themselves that a man may fill his belly without being beholden to fortune; which never denies any of us wherewith to satisfy our necessities, though she be never so angry! It is as easy to suffer it always as to try it once; and it is no more than thousands of servants and poor people do every day in their lives. He that would live happily, must neither trust to good fortune nor submit to bad: he must stand upon his guard against all assaults; he must stick to himself, without any dependence upon other people. Where the mind is tinctured with philosophy, there is no place for grief, anxiety, or superfluous vexations. It is prepossessed with virtue to the neglect of fortune, which brings us to a degree of security not to be disturbed. It is easier to give counsel than to take it; and a common thing for one choleric man to condemn another. We may be sometimes earnest in advising, but not violent or tedious. Few words, with gentleness and efficacy, are best: the misery is, that the wise do not need counsel, and fools will not take it. A good man, it is true, delights in it; and it is a mark of folly and ill-nature to hate reproof.
The main thing is to make sure we only pursue goals that are both realistic and honest. It will cause us equal trouble whether we fail or feel ashamed of our success. So let's be careful not to let any bad intentions into our hearts. We should lift up clean hands to heaven and ask for nothing that would harm another person. Let us pray for a good mind, which means wishing no harm to anyone. I will always remember that I am human. Then I'll consider that if I'm happy, it won't last forever. If I'm unhappy, I can change that if I choose to. I will hold my life lightly and give it up willingly when the time comes. I will be careful not to become a slave to myself, because that is a constant, shameful, and the worst kind of slavery. I can avoid this by keeping my desires moderate. I will say to myself, "What am I working, sweating, and begging for? I need very little, and I won't need anything for very long." Anyone who wants to test how strong their mind is should set aside certain days to practice virtue. Let them discipline themselves with fasting, rough clothes, and hard beds. Then they can say, "Is this what I was afraid of?" When we're safe, we can prepare ourselves for danger. When we have plenty, we can strengthen ourselves against want. If you want someone to be brave when the pressure comes, train them beforehand. A soldier practices in peacetime so he'll be ready for battle. Many great and wise people have tested their self-control by practicing extreme hunger and thirst. They proved to themselves that a person can fill their belly without depending on luck. Fortune never denies us what we need to survive, even when she's angry at us. It's as easy to endure hardship always as it is to try it once. It's no more than what thousands of servants and poor people do every day of their lives. Anyone who wants to live happily must neither trust good fortune nor give in to bad fortune. They must guard against all attacks. They must rely on themselves without depending on other people. When the mind is filled with philosophy, there's no room for grief, worry, or unnecessary troubles. It's so full of virtue that it ignores fortune, which brings us to a level of security that can't be disturbed. It's easier to give advice than to take it. It's common for one angry person to criticize another. We can sometimes be serious when giving advice, but not violent or boring. Few words, spoken gently but effectively, work best. The problem is that wise people don't need advice, and fools won't take it. A good person truly enjoys receiving advice. It's a sign of foolishness and bad character to hate correction.
To a friend I would be always frank and plain; and rather fail in the success than be wanting in the matter of faith and trust. There are some precepts that serve in common both to the rich and poor, but they are too general; as “Cure your avarice, and the work is done.” It is one thing not to desire money, and another thing not to understand how to use it. In the choice of the persons we have to do withal, we should see that they be worth our while; in the choice of our business, we are to consult nature, and follow our inclinations. He that gives sober advice to a witty droll must look to have every thing turned into ridicule. “As if you philosophers,” says Marcellinus, “did not love your whores and your guts as well as other people:” and then he tells you of such and such that were taken in the manner. We are all sick, I must confess, and it is not for sick men to play the physicians; but it is yet lawful for a man in an hospital to discourse of the common condition and distempers of the place. He that should pretend to teach a madman how to speak, walk, and behave himself, were not he the most mad man of the two? He that directs the pilot, makes him move the helm, order the sails so or so, and makes the best of a scant wind, after this or that manner. And so should we do in our counsels.
With a friend, I would always be honest and direct. I'd rather fail at something than break their faith and trust. Some advice works for both rich and poor people, but it's too general. Like saying "Stop being greedy, and you'll be fine." Not wanting money is one thing. Knowing how to use it properly is another. When choosing people to work with, make sure they're worth your time. When choosing your work, listen to your nature and follow what feels right. If you give serious advice to someone who makes jokes about everything, expect them to turn it all into a joke. "As if you philosophers," says Marcellinus, "didn't love your women and your pleasures just like everyone else." Then he points out specific examples of philosophers caught in the act. We're all sick, I'll admit. Sick people shouldn't try to be doctors. But a person in a hospital can still talk about the common problems and diseases of the place. If someone tried to teach a madman how to speak, walk, and act properly, wouldn't that person be the real madman? When you direct a ship's pilot, you tell him to move the wheel, adjust the sails this way or that, and make the best of weak winds in whatever way works. That's how we should give advice too.
Do not tell me what a man should do in health or poverty, but show me the way to be either sound or rich. Teach me to master my vices: for it is to no purpose, so long as I am under their government, to tell me what I must do when I am clear of it. In case of an avarice a little eased, a luxury moderated, a temerity restrained, a sluggish humor quickened; precepts will then help us forward, and tutor us how to behave ourselves. It is the first and the main tie of a soldier his military oath, which is an engagement upon him both of religion and honor. In like manner, he that pretends to a happy life must first lay a foundation of virtue, as a bond upon him, to live and die true to that cause. We do not find felicity in the veins of the earth where we dig for gold, nor in the bottom of the sea where we fish for pearls, but in a pure and untainted mind, which, if it were not holy, were not fit to entertain the Deity. “He that would be truly happy, must think his own lot best, and so live with men, as considering that God sees him, and so speak to God as if men heard him.”
Don't just tell me what a person should do when they're healthy or poor. Show me how to actually become healthy or wealthy. Teach me to control my bad habits. There's no point in telling me what to do when I'm free from these problems if I'm still controlled by them right now. Once greed is reduced a little, luxury is moderated, recklessness is held back, and laziness is energized, then advice can help us move forward. Then it can guide us on how to behave. A soldier's most important bond is his military oath. This creates a commitment based on both religion and honor. In the same way, anyone who wants a happy life must first build a foundation of virtue. This becomes a promise to live and die faithful to that cause. We don't find happiness in the earth's veins where we dig for gold. We don't find it at the bottom of the sea where we search for pearls. We find it in a pure and clean mind. If that mind weren't holy, it wouldn't be fit to welcome God. "Anyone who wants true happiness must think their own situation is best. They should live with others while remembering that God sees them. They should speak to God as if other people could hear them."