How the Author Set Out and First Arrived

After these sudden starts of Imagination, which may be termed, perhaps, the Ravings of a violent Feaver, I began to conceive some hopes of succeeding in so fair a Voyage: Insomuch that to take my measures aright, I shut my self up in a solitary Country-house; where having flattered my fancy with some means, proportionated to my design, at length I set out for Heaven in this manner.

After these sudden flights of imagination, which might perhaps be called the ravings of a violent fever, I began to hope I could succeed in such a splendid voyage. So, to plan it properly, I shut myself away in a secluded country house. There I indulged my imagination with ideas for ways to accomplish my purpose. At last, I set out for Heaven in this manner.

I planted my self in the middle of a great many Glasses full of Dew, tied fast about me;¹ upon which the Sun so violently darted his Rays, that the Heat, which attracted them, as it does the thickest Clouds, carried me up so high, that at length I found my self above the middle Region of the Air. But seeing that Attraction hurried me up with so much rapidity that instead of drawing near the Moon, as I intended, she seem'd to me to be more distant than at my first setting out; I broke several of my Vials, until I found my weight exceed the force of the Attraction, and that I began to descend again towards the Earth. I was not mistaken in my opinion, for some time after I fell to the ground again; and to reckon from the hour that I set out at, it must then have been about midnight. Nevertheless I found the Sun to be in the Meridian, and that it was Noon. I leave it to you to judge, in what Amazement I was; The truth is, I was so strangely surprised, that not knowing what to think of that Miracle, I had the insolence to imagine that in favour of my Boldness God had once more nailed the Sun to the Firmament, to light so generous² an Enterprise. That which encreased my Astonishment was, That I knew not the Country where I was; it seemed to me, that having mounted straight up, I should have fallen down again in the same place I parted from.

I placed myself among many glass containers full of dew, tied tightly around me.¹ The sun beat down on them fiercely. Its heat drew them up, just as it draws up the thickest clouds. It carried me so high that I eventually found myself above the middle region of the air. But the attraction carried me upward so quickly that the Moon seemed farther away than when I set out, instead of closer as I had intended. I broke several of my vials until my weight overcame the force of attraction. Then I began to descend toward the Earth again. I was right, for some time later I fell back to the ground. Judging by the hour when I had set out, it must have been about midnight. Nevertheless, I found the sun at its highest point in the sky, and it was noon. I leave you to judge how amazed I was. In truth, I was so startled that I did not know what to make of this miracle. I was bold enough to imagine that God had once again nailed the sun to the sky to light such a noble² enterprise, in recognition of my daring. What increased my astonishment was that I did not recognize the country where I was. It seemed to me that, having risen straight up, I should have fallen back down where I had started.

However, in the Equipage I was in, I directed my course towards a kind of Cottage, where I perceived some smoke; and I was not above a Pistol-shot from it, when I saw my self environed by a great number of People, stark naked: They seemed to be exceedingly surprised at the sight of me; for I was the first, (as I think) that they had ever seen clad in Bottles. Nay, and to baffle all the Interpretations that they could put upon that Equipage, they perceived that I hardly touched the ground as I walked; for, indeed, they understood not that upon the least agitation I gave my Body the Heat of the beams of the Noon-Sun raised me up with my Dew; and that if I had had Vials enough about me, it would possibly have carried me up into the Air in their view. I had a mind to have spoken to them; but as if Fear had changed them into Birds, immediately I lost sight of them in an adjoyning Forest. However, I catched hold of one, whose Legs had, without doubt, betrayed his Heart. I asked him, but with a great deal of pain, (for I was quite choked) how far they reckoned from thence to Paris? How long Men had gone naked in France? and why they fled from me in so great Consternation? The Man I spoke to was an old tawny Fellow, who presently fell at my Feet, and with lifted-up Hands joyned behind his Head, opened his Mouth and shut his Eyes: He mumbled a long while between his Teeth, but I could not distinguish an articulate Word; so that I took his Language for the maffling³ noise of a Dumb-man.

Still wearing my strange outfit, I headed toward a cottage where I saw some smoke. I was no more than a pistol shot away when a great number of stark naked people surrounded me. They seemed astonished to see me. I believe I was the first person they had ever seen dressed in bottles. To make my outfit even harder to explain, they noticed that I hardly touched the ground as I walked. They did not understand that whenever I moved my body slightly, the heat of the noon sun lifted me with my dew. If I had worn enough vials, it might have carried me into the air before their eyes. I wanted to speak to them, but they vanished into a nearby forest, as if fear had turned them into birds. However, I caught one man whose legs had no doubt betrayed his courage. I asked him several questions, though with great difficulty, for I was quite choked. How far was it from there to Paris? How long had men gone naked in France? Why had they fled from me in such terror? The man I spoke to was an old tawny fellow. He immediately fell at my feet and raised his hands behind his head. Then he opened his mouth and closed his eyes. He mumbled between his teeth for a long time, but I could not make out a single word. So I took his language for the muffled³ noise of a mute man.

Some time after, I saw a Company of Souldiers marching, with Drums beating; and I perceived Two detached from the rest, to come and take speech of me. When they were come within hearing, I asked them, Where I was? "You are in France" answered they: "But what Devil hath put you into that Dress? And how comes it that we know you not? Is the Fleet then arrived? Are you going to carry the News of it to the Governor? And why have you divided your Brandy into so many Bottles?" To all this I made answer, That the Devil had not put me into that Dress: That they knew me not; because they could not know all Men: That I knew, nothing of the Seine's carrying Ships to Paris: That I had no news for the Marshal de l'Hospital;⁴ and that I was not loaded with Brandy. "Ho, ho," said they to me, taking me by the Arm, "you are a merry Fellow indeed; come, the Governor will make a shift to know you, no doubt on't."

Some time later, I saw a company of soldiers marching with drums beating. Two of them left the others and came to speak to me. When they were close enough to hear me, I asked where I was. "You are in France," they answered. "But what devil put you in that outfit? And how is it that we don't know you? Has the fleet arrived, then? Are you going to tell the governor? And why have you divided your brandy among so many bottles?" I answered that the devil had not put me in that outfit. They did not know me because they could not know everyone. I knew nothing about the Seine carrying ships to Paris. I had no news for the Marshal de l'Hospital,⁴ and I was not carrying brandy. "Ho, ho," they said, taking me by the arm. "You're a merry fellow, indeed. Come along. The governor will find a way to recognize you, no doubt."

They led me to their Company, where I learnt that I was in reality in France, but that it was in New-France: So that some time after, I was presented before the Governor, who asked me my Country, my Name and Quality; and after that I had satisfied him in all Points, and told him the pleasant Success of my Voyage, whether he believed it, or only pretended to do so, he had the goodness to order me a Chamber in his Apartment. I was very happy, in meeting with a Man capable of lofty Opinions, and who was not at all surprised when I told him that the Earth must needs have turned during my Elevation; seeing that having begun to mount about Two Leagues from Paris, I was fallen, as it were, by a perpendicular Line in Canada.

They took me to their company, where I learned that I was indeed in France, but in New-France. Some time later, I was presented to the Governor. He asked me my country, my name, and my rank. I answered all his questions and told him the amusing outcome of my voyage. Whether he believed me or only pretended to, he kindly ordered a room for me in his own quarters. I was very happy to meet a man capable of bold ideas. He was not at all surprised when I told him that the Earth must have turned while I was aloft. After all, I had begun to rise about two leagues from Paris and had fallen, as if straight down, in Canada.