Courtship

On arrival in Poona, we found ourselves, after the performance of the shraddha ceremonies, discussing the future of the Society, and the question as to whether I should join it or not. This question of membership proved a very delicate matter for me to handle. Whilst Gokhale was there I did not have to seek admission as a member. I had simply to obey his wish, a position I loved to be in. Launching on the stormy sea of Indian public life I was in need of a sure pilot. I had had one in Gokhale and had felt secure in his keeping. Now that he was gone, I was thrown on my own resources, and I felt that it was my duty to seek admission. That, I thought, would please Gokhale’s spirit. So without hesitation and with firmness I began the wooing.

When we arrived in Poona, we performed the shraddha ceremonies. Afterward, we discussed the Society’s future and whether I should join it. The question of membership was very delicate for me. While Gokhale was alive, I did not have to apply for membership. I simply had to follow his wishes, and I loved being in that position. As I set out on the stormy sea of Indian public life, I needed a sure pilot. Gokhale had been that pilot, and I had felt safe in his care. Now that he was gone, I had to rely on myself. I felt it was my duty to apply for membership. I thought this would please Gokhale’s spirit. So, without hesitation and with determination, I began to seek admission.

Most of the members of the Society were in Poona at this juncture. I set about pleading with them and tried to dispel their fears about me. But I saw that they were divided. One section favoured my admission, the other was strongly against it. I knew that neither yielded to the other in its affection for me, but possibly their loyalty to the Society was greater, at any rate not less than their love for me.

Most of the Society’s members were in Poona at this time. I tried to persuade them and ease their fears about me. But I saw that they were divided. One group supported admitting me, while the other was strongly opposed. I knew that both groups were equally fond of me. But perhaps their loyalty to the Society was greater than their love for me, or at least no less.

All our discussions were therefore free from bitterness, and strictly confined to matters of principle. The section that was opposed to me held that they and I were as the poles asunder in various vital matters, and they felt that my membership was likely to imperil the very objects for which the Society was founded. This naturally was more than they could bear.

All our discussions were therefore free of bitterness and focused strictly on matters of principle. The group that opposed me believed we were poles apart on several vital matters. They felt that my membership was likely to endanger the very goals for which the Society was founded. Naturally, this was more than they could bear.

We dispersed after prolonged discussions, the final decision being postponed to a later date.

After a long discussion, we parted without making a final decision. We put the decision off until later.

I was considerably agitated as I returned home. Was it right for me to be admitted by a majority vote? Would it be consonant with my loyalty to Gokhale? I saw it clearly that when there was such a sharp division amongst the members of the Society over admitting me, by far the best course for me was to withdraw my application for admission and save those opposed to me from a delicate situation. Therein I thought lay my loyalty to the Society and Gokhale. The decision came to me in a flash, and immediately I wrote to Mr. Shastri asking him not to have the adjourned meeting at all. Those who had opposed my application fully appreciated the decision. It saved them from an awkward position, and bound us in closer bonds of friendship. The withdrawal of my application made me truly a member of the Society.

I was very troubled as I returned home. Was it right for me to be admitted by a majority vote? Would that be consistent with my loyalty to Gokhale? The Society’s members were sharply divided over admitting me. I saw clearly that the best course was to withdraw my application. That would spare those who opposed me a difficult situation. I believed that withdrawing was the loyal thing to do for the Society and Gokhale. The decision came to me in a flash. I immediately wrote to Mr. Shastri, asking him not to hold the postponed meeting at all. Those who had opposed my application fully appreciated my decision. It saved them from an awkward position and brought us closer together as friends. By withdrawing my application, I became a true member of the Society.

Experience now tells me that it was well that I did not formally become a member and that the opposition of those who had been against me was justified. Experience has shown too that our views on matters of principle were widely divergent. But the recognition of the differences has meant no estrangement or bitterness between us. We have remained as brothers, and the Society’s Poona home has always been for me a place of pilgrimage.

Experience now tells me that it was right not to become a formal member. Those who opposed my membership were justified. Experience has also shown that our views on matters of principle were very different. But recognizing these differences has not driven us apart or made us bitter. We have remained like brothers, and the Society’s Poona home has always been a place of pilgrimage for me.

It is true that I did not officially become a member of the Society, but I have ever been a member in spirit. Spiritual relationship is far more precious than the physical. Physical relationship divorced from the spiritual is like body without soul.

It is true that I never officially joined the Society, but I have always been a member in spirit. A spiritual relationship is far more precious than a physical one. A physical relationship without a spiritual connection is like a body without a soul.