The Condition of Women in the United States

My dear Sister,—I have now taken a brief survey of the condition of woman in various parts of the world. I regret that my time has been so much occupied by other things, that I have been unable to bestow that attention upon the subject which it merits, and that my constant change of place has prevented me from having access to books, which might probably have assisted me in this part of my work. I hope that the principles I have asserted will claim the attention of some of my sex, who may be able to bring into view, more thoroughly than I have done, the situation and degradation of woman. I shall now proceed to make a few remarks on the condition of women in my own country.

My dear Sister, I have now briefly surveyed the condition of women in various parts of the world. I regret that other things have taken up so much of my time. As a result, I have been unable to give the subject the attention it deserves. I have also been constantly moving from place to place, which has kept me from books that might have helped me with this part of my work. I hope that some women will pay attention to the principles I have stated. They may be able to show the situation and degradation of women more thoroughly than I have. I will now make a few remarks on the condition of women in my own country.

During the early part of my life, my lot was cast among the butterflies of the fashionable world; and of this class of women, I am constrained to say, both from experience and observation, that their education is miserably deficient; that they are taught to regard marriage as the one thing needful, the only avenue to distinction; hence to attract the notice and win the attentions of men, by their external charms, is the chief business of fashionable girls. They seldom think that men will be allured by intellectual acquirements, because they find, that where any mental superiority exists, a woman is generally shunned and regarded as stepping out of her ‘appropriate sphere,’ which, in their view, is to dress, to dance, to set out to the best possible advantage her person, to read the novels which inundate the press, and which do more to destroy her character as a rational creature, than any thing else. Fashionable women regard themselves, and are regarded by men, as pretty toys or as mere instruments of pleasure; and the vacuity of mind, the heartlessness, the frivolity which is the necessary result of this false and debasing estimate of women, can only be fully understood by those who have mingled in the folly and wickedness of fashionable life; and who have been called from such pursuits by the voice of the Lord Jesus, inviting their weary and heavy laden souls to come unto Him and learn of Him, that they may find something worthy of their immortal spirit, and their intellectual powers; that they may learn the high and holy purposes of their creation, and consecrate themselves unto the service of God; and not, as is now the case, to the pleasure of man.

In my early life, I lived among the butterflies of the fashionable world. From experience and observation, I must say that the education of these women is terribly inadequate. They are taught to regard marriage as the one thing they need, the only path to distinction. So the chief business of fashionable girls is to attract men and win their attention through their looks. They seldom think that men will be attracted by intellectual accomplishments. They find that a woman with superior intellect is generally avoided and seen as stepping outside her ‘appropriate sphere.’ In their view, that sphere is to dress, dance, and display her person to the best advantage. It is also to read the novels that flood the press. These novels do more than anything else to destroy her character as a rational being. Fashionable women see themselves as pretty toys or mere instruments of pleasure, and men see them that way too. This false and degrading view of women necessarily produces empty minds, heartlessness, and frivolity. Only those who have shared in the folly and wickedness of fashionable life can fully understand these results. They must also have been called away from such pursuits by the voice of the Lord Jesus. He invites their weary and burdened souls to come to him and learn from him. Then they may find something worthy of their immortal spirit and their intellectual powers. They may learn the high and holy purposes for which they were created. And they may devote themselves to the service of God, rather than, as now, to the pleasure of man.

There is another and much more numerous class in this country, who are withdrawn by education or circumstances from the circle of fashionable amusements, but who are brought up with the dangerous and absurd idea, that marriage is a kind of preferment; and that to be able to keep their husband’s house, and render his situation comfortable, is the end of her being. Much that she does and says and thinks is done in reference to this situation; and to be married is too often held up to the view of girls as the sine qua non of human happiness and human existence. For this purpose more than for any other, I verily believe the majority of girls are trained. This is demonstrated by the imperfect education which is bestowed upon them, and the little pains taken to cultivate their minds, after they leave school, by the little time allowed them for reading, and by the idea being constantly inculcated, that although all household concerns should be attended to with scrupulous punctuality at particular seasons, the improvement of their intellectual capacities is only a secondary consideration, and may serve as an occupation to fill up the odds and ends of time. In most families, it is considered a matter of far more consequence to call a girl off from making a pie, or a pudding, than to interrupt her whilst engaged in her studies. This mode of training necessarily exalts, in their view, the animal above the intellectual and spiritual nature, and teaches women to regard themselves as a kind of machinery, necessary to keep the domestic engine in order, but of little value as the intelligent companions of men.

There is another, much larger class of women in this country. Their education or circumstances keep them away from fashionable amusements. But they are raised with the dangerous and absurd idea that marriage is a kind of promotion. They are taught that their purpose in life is to keep their husbands’ houses and make them comfortable. Much of what a woman does, says, and thinks is shaped by this expectation. Girls are too often taught that marriage is essential to human happiness and human existence. I truly believe that most girls are trained for this purpose above all others. Their incomplete education demonstrates this. So does the little effort made to develop their minds after they leave school. They are allowed little time to read. And they are constantly taught that all household duties must be attended to promptly at their proper times. Developing their minds, however, is only a secondary concern, something to occupy the odd moments left over. In most families, interrupting a girl while she makes a pie or pudding is considered far more serious than interrupting her studies. This kind of training necessarily leads women to value their animal nature above their intellectual and spiritual nature. It teaches them to see themselves as a kind of machinery needed to keep the household running smoothly. But it teaches them that they have little value as the intelligent companions of men.

Let no one think, from these remarks, that I regard a knowledge of housewifery as beneath the acquisition of women. Far from it: I believe that a complete knowledge of household affairs is an indispensable requisite in a woman’s education,—that by the mistress of a family, whether married or single, doing her duty thoroughly and understandingly, the happiness of the family is increased to an incalculable degree, as well as a vast amount of time and money saved. All I complain of is, that our education consists so almost exclusively in culinary and other manual operations. I do long to see the time, when it will no longer be necessary for women to expend so many precious hours in furnishing ‘a well spread table,’ but that their husbands will forego some of their accustomed indulgences in this way, and encourage their wives to devote some portion of their time to mental cultivation, even at the expense of having to dine sometimes on baked potatoes, or bread and butter.

Let no one think that I consider learning to manage a household beneath women. Far from it. I believe that a complete knowledge of household affairs is essential to a woman’s education. When a woman in charge of a household, married or single, does her duty thoroughly and knowledgeably, the family’s happiness increases immeasurably. She also saves a great deal of time and money. My only complaint is that our education consists almost entirely of cooking and other manual tasks. I long for the day when women will no longer need to spend so many precious hours providing ‘a well spread table.’ Instead, husbands will give up some of the indulgences they are accustomed to at the table. They will encourage their wives to spend some time cultivating their minds, even if it means sometimes dining on baked potatoes or bread and butter.

I believe the sentiment expressed by the author of ‘Live and let Live,’ is true:

I believe the author of ‘Live and let Live’ is right:

The influence of women over the minds and character of children of both sexes, is allowed to be far greater than that of men. This being the case by the very ordering of nature, women should be prepared by education for the performance of their sacred duties as mothers and as sisters. A late American writer,² speaking on this subject, says in reference to an article in the Westminster Review:

Women are recognized as having far greater influence than men on the minds and character of children of both sexes. Because nature itself has arranged things this way, education should prepare women for their sacred duties as mothers and sisters. A recent American writer,² discussing this subject, refers to an article in the Westminster Review and says:

There is another way in which the general opinion, that women are inferior to men, is manifested, that bears with tremendous effect on the laboring class, and indeed on almost all who are obliged to earn a subsistence, whether it be by mental or physical exertion—I allude to the disproportionate value set on the time and labor of men and of women. A man who is engaged in teaching, can always, I believe, command a higher price for tuition than a woman—even when he teaches the same branches, and is not in any respect superior to the woman. This I know is the case in boarding and other schools with which I have been acquainted, and it is so in every occupation in which the sexes engage indiscriminately. As for example, in tailoring, a man has twice, or three times as much for making a waistcoat or pantaloons as a woman, although the work done by each may be equally good. In those employments which are peculiar to women, their time is estimated at only half the value of that of men. A woman who goes out to wash, works as hard in proportion as a wood sawyer, or a coal heaver, but she is not generally able to make more than half as much by a day’s work. The low remuneration which women receive for their work, has claimed the attention of a few philanthropists, and I hope it will continue to do so until some remedy is applied for this enormous evil. I have known a widow, left with four or five children, to provide for, unable to leave home because her helpless babes demand her attention, compelled to earn a scanty subsistence, by making coarse shirts at 12¹⁄₂ cents a piece, or by taking in washing, for which she was paid by some wealthy persons 12¹⁄₂ cents per dozen. All these things evince the low estimation in which woman is held. There is yet another and more disastrous consequence arising from this unscriptural notion—women being educated, from earliest childhood, to regard themselves as inferior creatures, have not that self-respect which conscious equality would engender, and hence when their virtue is assailed, they yield to temptation with facility, under the idea that it rather exalts than debases them, to be connected with a superior being.

The widespread belief that women are inferior to men shows itself in another way. This belief has a tremendous effect on working people and almost everyone who must earn a living, whether through mental or physical work. I mean the unequal value placed on men’s and women’s time and labor. I believe a male teacher can always charge more for tuition than a woman. This is true even when he teaches the same subjects and is in no way superior to her. I know this happens in boarding schools and other schools I have known. It also happens in every occupation open to both sexes. In tailoring, for example, a man is paid two or three times as much as a woman for making a vest or trousers, although their work may be equally good. In jobs done only by women, their time is valued at only half that of men. A woman who goes out to do washing works proportionately as hard as a wood sawyer or a coal heaver. But she generally cannot earn more than half as much for a day’s work. A few philanthropists have taken notice of the low pay women receive for their work. I hope they will continue until a remedy is found for this enormous evil. I have known a widow left to provide for four or five children. She could not leave home because her helpless babies needed her attention. She was forced to earn a meager living by making coarse shirts for 12¹⁄₂ cents each or by taking in washing. Some wealthy people paid her 12¹⁄₂ cents per dozen items. All these things show how little women are valued. This belief, which goes against scripture, has another, more disastrous consequence. From earliest childhood, women are taught to regard themselves as inferior creatures. As a result, they lack the self-respect that knowing they are equal would foster. So when their virtue is threatened, they easily yield to temptation. They believe that a relationship with a superior being raises rather than lowers them.

There is another class of women in this country, to whom I cannot refer, without feelings of the deepest shame and sorrow. I allude to our female slaves. Our southern cities are whelmed beneath a tide of pollution; the virtue of female slaves is wholly at the mercy of irresponsible tyrants, and women are bought and sold in our slave markets, to gratify the brutal lust of those who bear the name of Christians. In our slave States, if amid all her degradation and ignorance, a woman desires to preserve her virtue unsullied, she is either bribed or whipped into compliance, or if she dares resist her seducer, her life by the laws of some of the slave States may be, and has actually been sacrificed to the fury of disappointed passion. Where such laws do not exist, the power which is necessarily vested in the master over his property, leaves the defenceless slave entirely at his mercy, and the sufferings of some females on this account, both physical and mental, are intense. Mr. Gholson, in the House of Delegates of Virginia, in 1832, said, ‘He really had been under the impression that he owned his slaves. He had lately purchased four women and ten children, in whom he thought he had obtained a great bargain; for he supposed they were his own property, as were his brood mares.’ But even if any laws existed in the United States, as in Athens formerly, for the protection of female slaves, they would be null and void, because the evidence of a colored person is not admitted against a white, in any of our Courts of Justice in the slave States. ‘In Athens, if a female slave had cause to complain of any want of respect to the laws of modesty, she could seek the protection of the temple, and demand a change of owners; and such appeals were never discountenanced, or neglected by the magistrate.’ In Christian America, the slave has no refuge from unbridled cruelty and lust.

There is another class of women in this country whom I cannot mention without the deepest shame and sorrow. I mean our female slaves. Our southern cities are overwhelmed by a tide of corruption. The virtue of female slaves is entirely at the mercy of tyrants who answer to no one. Women are bought and sold in our slave markets to satisfy the brutal lust of those who call themselves Christians. In our slave States, a woman may wish to keep her virtue intact despite her degradation and ignorance. If so, she is either bribed or whipped into submission. If she dares to resist her seducer, the laws of some slave States may allow her life to be taken. Lives have actually been sacrificed to the fury of frustrated passion. Where such laws do not exist, the power a master necessarily has over his property leaves the defenseless slave entirely at his mercy. Some women suffer intensely, both physically and mentally, as a result. In 1832, Mr. Gholson said in the House of Delegates of Virginia, ‘He really had thought that he owned his slaves. He had recently bought four women and ten children, and he thought he had gotten a great bargain. He supposed they were his own property, like his brood mares.’ But suppose laws existed in the United States to protect female slaves, as they once did in Athens. Even then, the laws would have no force. That is because no court in our slave States admits the testimony of a colored person against a white person. ‘In Athens, if a female slave had reason to complain that the laws of modesty had been violated, she could seek protection in a temple. She could also demand a change of owners. Magistrates never discouraged or neglected such appeals.’ In Christian America, the slave has no refuge from unrestrained cruelty and lust.

S. A. Forrall, speaking of the state of morals at the South, says, ‘Negresses when young and likely, are often employed by the planter, or his friends, to administer to their sensual desires. This frequently is a matter of speculation, for if the offspring, a mulatto, be a handsome female, 800 or 1000 dollars may be obtained for her in the New Orleans market. It is an occurrence of no uncommon nature to see a Christian father sell his own daughter, and the brother his own sister.’ The following is copied by the N. Y. Evening Star from the Picayune, a paper published in New Orleans. ‘A very beautiful girl, belonging to the estate of John French, a deceased gambler at New Orleans, was sold a few days since for the round sum of $7,000. An ugly-looking bachelor named Gouch, a member of the Council of one of the Principalities, was the purchaser. The girl is a brunette; remarkable for her beauty and intelligence, and there was considerable contention, who should be the purchaser. She was, however, persuaded to accept Gouch, he having made her princely promises.’ I will add but one more from the numerous testimonies respecting the degradation of female slaves, and the licentiousness of the South. It is from the Circular of the Kentucky Union, for the moral and religious improvement of the colored race. ‘To the female character among our black population, we cannot allude but with feelings of the bitterest shame. A similar condition of moral pollution and utter disregard of a pure and virtuous reputation, is to be found only without the pale of Christendom. That such a state of society should exist in a Christian nation, claiming to be the most enlightened upon earth, without calling forth any particular attention to its existence, though ever before our eyes and in our families, is a moral phenomenon at once unaccountable and disgraceful.’ Nor does the colored woman suffer alone: the moral purity of the white woman is deeply contaminated. In the daily habit of seeing the virtue of her enslaved sister sacrificed without hesitancy or remorse, she looks upon the crimes of seduction and illicit intercourse without horror, and although not personally involved in the guilt, she loses that value for innocence in her own, as well as the other sex, which is one of the strongest safeguards to virtue. She lives in habitual intercourse with men, whom she knows to be polluted by licentiousness, and often is she compelled to witness in her own domestic circle, those disgusting and heart-sickening jealousies and strifes which disgraced and distracted the family of Abraham. In addition to all this, the female slaves suffer every species of degradation and cruelty, which the most wanton barbarity can inflict; they are indecently divested of their clothing, sometimes tied up and severely whipped, sometimes prostrated on the earth, while their naked bodies are torn by the scorpion lash.

S. A. Forrall, describing the state of morals in the South, says, ‘Young, attractive Negresses are often used by the planter or his friends to satisfy their sexual desires. This is often a business venture. If the child, a mulatto, is a beautiful girl, she may fetch 800 or 1000 dollars at the New Orleans market. It is not uncommon to see a Christian father sell his own daughter, or a brother sell his own sister.’ The N. Y. Evening Star copied the following from the Picayune, a newspaper published in New Orleans. ‘A very beautiful girl belonging to the estate of John French was sold a few days ago for the considerable sum of $7,000. French was a gambler who died in New Orleans. The buyer was an ugly-looking bachelor named Gouch, a member of the Council of one of the Principalities. The girl is a brunette, remarkable for her beauty and intelligence. Many people competed to buy her. She was, however, persuaded to accept Gouch, who had made her grand promises.’ I will add only one more of the many testimonies about the degradation of female slaves and the sexual immorality of the South. It comes from the Circular of the Kentucky Union, for the moral and religious improvement of the colored race. ‘We cannot speak of the character of women among our black population without feelings of the deepest shame. Such moral corruption and complete disregard for a pure and virtuous reputation can be found only outside the bounds of Christendom. Such a state of society exists in a Christian nation that claims to be the most enlightened on earth. Yet its existence calls forth no particular attention, though it is always before our eyes and in our families. This moral phenomenon is both inexplicable and disgraceful.’ Nor does the colored woman suffer alone. The moral purity of the white woman is deeply contaminated. Every day, she sees the virtue of her enslaved sister sacrificed without hesitation or remorse. As a result, she views seduction and illicit sex without horror. Although she is not personally guilty, she loses her regard for innocence in both women and men. That regard is one of the strongest safeguards of virtue. She regularly associates with men whom she knows to be corrupted by sexual immorality. Often, in her own household, she is forced to witness the disgusting and heartbreaking jealousies and conflicts that disgraced and disturbed Abraham's family. In addition, female slaves suffer every kind of degradation and cruelty that the most reckless barbarity can inflict. They are indecently stripped of their clothing. Sometimes they are tied up and severely whipped. Sometimes they are laid on the ground, while the scorpion lash tears their naked bodies.

Can any American woman look at these scenes of shocking licentiousness and cruelty, and fold her hands in apathy, and say, ‘I have nothing to do with slavery’? She cannot and be guiltless.

Can any American woman look at these scenes of shocking sexual abuse and cruelty and do nothing? Can she say, ‘I have nothing to do with slavery’? She cannot do so without guilt.

I cannot close this letter, without saying a few words on the benefits to be derived by men, as well as women, from the opinions I advocate relative to the equality of the sexes. Many women are now supported, in idleness and extravagance, by the industry of their husbands, fathers, or brothers, who are compelled to toil out their existence, at the counting house, or in the printing office, or some other laborious occupation, while the wife and daughters and sisters take no part in the support of the family, and appear to think that their sole business is to spend the hard bought earnings of their male friends. I deeply regret such a state of things, because I believe that if women felt their responsibility, for the support of themselves, or their families it would add strength and dignity to their characters, and teach them more true sympathy for their husbands, than is now generally manifested,—a sympathy which would be exhibited by actions as well as words. Our brethren may reject my doctrine, because it runs counter to common opinions, and because it wounds their pride; but I believe they would be ‘partakers of the benefit’ resulting from the Equality of the Sexes, and would find that woman, as their equal, was unspeakably more valuable than woman as their inferior, both as a moral and an intellectual being.

I cannot close this letter without saying a few words about how men, as well as women, would benefit from the equality of the sexes that I advocate. Many women now live in idleness and extravagance, supported by the work of their husbands, fathers, or brothers. These men are forced to spend their lives toiling in offices, printing shops, or other demanding jobs. Meanwhile, their wives, daughters, and sisters do nothing to support the family. They seem to think their only job is to spend the money their male relatives have worked so hard to earn. I deeply regret this situation. I believe that if women felt responsible for supporting themselves or their families, their characters would gain strength and dignity. They would also learn to feel more genuine sympathy for their husbands than they generally show now. They would express that sympathy through actions as well as words. Our brothers may reject my views because they go against common opinion and wound their pride. But I believe men would be ‘partakers of the benefit’ resulting from the equality of the sexes. They would find that woman as their equal was far more valuable than woman as their inferior, both morally and intellectually.