Continued Persecution

My children grew finely; and Dr. Flint would often say to me, with an exulting smile. “These brats will bring me a handsome sum of money one of these days.”

My children grew well. Dr. Flint would often say to me with a triumphant smile, “These brats will bring me a lot of money one of these days.”

I thought to myself that, God being my helper, they should never pass into his hands. It seemed to me I would rather see them killed than have them given up to his power. The money for the freedom of myself and my children could be obtained; but I derived no advantage from that circumstance. Dr. Flint loved money, but he loved power more. After much discussion, my friends resolved on making another trial. There was a slaveholder about to leave for Texas, and he was commissioned to buy me. He was to begin with nine hundred dollars, and go up to twelve. My master refused his offers. “Sir,” said he, “she don’t belong to me. She is my daughter’s property, and I have no right to sell her. I mistrust that you come from her paramour. If so, you may tell him that he cannot buy her for any money; neither can he buy her children.”

I told myself that, with God’s help, my children would never fall into his hands. I felt I would rather see them killed than given over to his power. The money to buy freedom for my children and me could be found, but that did me no good. Dr. Flint loved money, but he loved power more. After much discussion, my friends decided to try again. A slaveholder who was about to leave for Texas was asked to buy me. He was to offer nine hundred dollars at first and go as high as twelve hundred. My master refused his offers. “Sir,” he said, “she doesn’t belong to me. She is my daughter’s property, and I have no right to sell her. I suspect you were sent by her lover. If so, you can tell him that he cannot buy her for any amount of money. He cannot buy her children either.”

The doctor came to see me the next day, and my heart beat quicker as he entered. I never had seen the old man tread with so majestic a step. He seated himself and looked at me with withering scorn. My children had learned to be afraid of him. The little one would shut her eyes and hide her face on my shoulder whenever she saw him; and Benny, who was now nearly five years old, often inquired, “What makes that bad man come here so many times? Does he want to hurt us?” I would clasp the dear boy in my arms, trusting that he would be free before he was old enough to solve the problem. And now, as the doctor sat there so grim and silent, the child left his play and came and nestled up by me. At last my tormentor spoke. “So you are left in disgust, are you?” said he. “It is no more than I expected. You remember I told you years ago that you would be treated so. So he is tired of you? Ha! ha! ha! The virtuous madam don’t like to hear about it, does she? Ha! ha! ha!” There was a sting in his calling me virtuous madam. I no longer had the power of answering him as I had formerly done. He continued: “So it seems you are trying to get up another intrigue. Your new paramour came to me, and offered to buy you; but you may be assured you will not succeed. You are mine; and you shall be mine for life. There lives no human being that can take you out of slavery. I would have done it; but you rejected my kind offer.”

The doctor came to see me the next day, and my heart beat faster as he entered. I had never seen the old man walk with such a grand stride. He sat down and looked at me with crushing scorn. My children had learned to fear him. Whenever the little one saw him, she would close her eyes and hide her face against my shoulder. Benny, who was now nearly five, often asked, “Why does that bad man come here so often? Does he want to hurt us?” I would hold the dear boy in my arms. I hoped he would be free before he was old enough to understand why the doctor came. Now, as the doctor sat there, grim and silent, the child stopped playing and came to nestle beside me. At last my tormentor spoke. “So he has left you in disgust, has he?” he said. “It is no more than I expected. You remember I told you years ago that you would be treated this way. So he is tired of you? Ha! ha! ha! The virtuous madam doesn’t like to hear about it, does she? Ha! ha! ha!” It hurt to hear him call me “virtuous madam.” I no longer had the strength to answer him as I once had. He continued: “So it seems you are trying to start another affair. Your new lover came to me and offered to buy you. But you can be sure you will not succeed. You are mine, and you will be mine for life. No human being alive can take you out of slavery. I would have freed you, but you rejected my kind offer.”

I told him I did not wish to get up any intrigue; that I had never seen the man who offered to buy me.

I told him I did not want to start any scheme. I had never seen the man who offered to buy me.

“Do you tell me I lie?” exclaimed he, dragging me from my chair. “Will you say again that you never saw that man?”

“Are you calling me a liar?” he exclaimed, dragging me from my chair. “Will you say again that you never saw that man?”

I answered, “I do say so.”

I replied, “I do say so.”

He clinched my arm with a volley of oaths. Ben began to scream, and I told him to go to his grandmother.

He gripped my arm and cursed repeatedly. Ben began to scream, and I told him to go to his grandmother.

“Don’t you stir a step, you little wretch!” said he. The child drew nearer to me, and put his arms round me, as if he wanted to protect me. This was too much for my enraged master. He caught him up and hurled him across the room. I thought he was dead, and rushed towards him to take him up.

“Don’t move a step, you little wretch!” he said. The child came closer and put his arms around me, as if he wanted to protect me. My angry master could not bear to see this. He picked the child up and threw him across the room. I thought he was dead and rushed over to pick him up.

“Not yet!” exclaimed the doctor. “Let him lie there till he comes to.”

“Not yet!” the doctor exclaimed. “Let him lie there until he regains consciousness.”

“Let me go! Let me go!” I screamed, “or I will raise the whole house.” I struggled and got away; but he clinched me again. Somebody opened the door, and he released me. I picked up my insensible child, and when I turned my tormentor was gone. Anxiously, I bent over the little form, so pale and still; and when the brown eyes at last opened, I don’t know whether I was very happy.

“Let me go! Let me go!” I screamed. “Or I’ll wake everyone in the house.” I struggled and got away, but he grabbed me again. Someone opened the door, and he let me go. I picked up my unconscious child, and when I turned around, my tormentor was gone. I bent anxiously over my child’s little body, so pale and still. When her brown eyes finally opened, I don’t know whether I was very happy.

All the doctor’s former persecutions were renewed. He came morning, noon, and night. No jealous lover ever watched a rival more closely than he watched me and the unknown slaveholder, with whom he accused me of wishing to get up an intrigue. When my grandmother was out of the way he searched every room to find him.

All the doctor’s old harassment began again. He came morning, noon, and night. He watched me and the unknown slaveholder more closely than any jealous lover ever watched a rival. He accused me of wanting to have an affair with the slaveholder. Whenever my grandmother was away, he searched every room for him.

In one of his visits, he happened to find a young girl, whom he had sold to a trader a few days previous. His statement was, that he sold her because she had been too familiar with the overseer. She had had a bitter life with him, and was glad to be sold. She had no mother, and no near ties. She had been torn from all her family years before. A few friends had entered into bonds for her safety, if the trader would allow her to spend with them the time that intervened between her sale and the gathering up of his human stock. Such a favor was rarely granted. It saved the trader the expense of board and jail fees, and though the amount was small, it was a weighty consideration in a slave-trader’s mind.

During one of his visits, he happened to find a young girl he had sold to a trader a few days earlier. He said he had sold her because she had been too familiar with the overseer. She had lived a bitter life with him and was glad to be sold. She had no mother and no close ties. She had been torn from all her family years before. A few friends had pledged to guarantee her safety if the trader would let her stay with them until he gathered his human stock. Such a favor was rarely granted. It saved the trader the cost of board and jail fees. Though the amount was small, it was an important consideration to a slave trader.

Dr. Flint always had an aversion to meeting slaves after he had sold them. He ordered Rose out of the house; but he was no longer her master, and she took no notice of him. For once the crushed Rose was the conqueror. His gray eyes flashed angrily upon her; but that was the extent of his power. “How came this girl here?” he exclaimed. “What right had you to allow it, when you knew I had sold her?”

Dr. Flint always hated meeting enslaved people after he had sold them. He ordered Rose out of the house, but he was no longer her master. She ignored him. For once, the crushed Rose had won. His gray eyes flashed angrily at her, but that was all he could do. “How did this girl get here?” he exclaimed. “What right did you have to let her in when you knew I had sold her?”

I answered, “This is my grandmother’s house, and Rose came to see her. I have no right to turn any body out of doors, that comes here for honest purposes.”

I answered, “This is my grandmother’s house, and Rose came to see her. I have no right to turn away anyone who comes here for an honest purpose.”

He gave me the blow that would have fallen upon Rose if she had still been his slave. My grandmother’s attention had been attracted by loud voices, and she entered in time to see a second blow dealt. She was not a woman to let such an outrage, in her own house, go unrebuked. The doctor undertook to explain that I had been insolent. Her indignant feelings rose higher and higher, and finally boiled over in words. “Get out of my house!” she exclaimed. “Go home, and take care of your wife and children, and you will have enough to do, without watching my family.”

He struck me instead of Rose, whom he would have struck if she had still been his slave. My grandmother heard loud voices and came in just in time to see him strike me again. She was not a woman to let such an outrage go unchallenged in her own house. The doctor tried to explain that I had been disrespectful. Her anger grew until she finally spoke out. “Get out of my house!” she exclaimed. “Go home and take care of your wife and children. You will have enough to do without watching my family.”

He threw the birth of my children in her face, and accused her of sanctioning the life I was leading. She told him I was living with her by compulsion of his wife; that he needn’t accuse her, for he was the one to blame; he was the one who had caused all the trouble. She grew more and more excited as she went on. “I tell you what, Dr. Flint,” said she, “you ain’t got many more years to live, and you’d better be saying your prayers. It will take ’em all, and more too, to wash the dirt off your soul.”

He brought up the birth of my children to shame her, and accused her of approving of how I was living. She told him I was living with her because his wife had forced me to. She said he had no reason to accuse her, because he was to blame. He was the one who had caused all the trouble. She grew more and more upset as she went on. “I’ll tell you what, Dr. Flint,” she said, “you don’t have many more years to live, and you’d better start saying your prayers. It will take all those prayers, and more, to wash the dirt off your soul.”

“Do you know whom you are talking to?” he exclaimed.

“Do you know who you’re talking to?” he exclaimed.

She replied, “Yes, I know very well who I am talking to.”

She replied, “Yes, I know very well who I’m talking to.”

He left the house in a great rage. I looked at my grandmother. Our eyes met. Their angry expression had passed away, but she looked sorrowful and weary—weary of incessant strife. I wondered that it did not lessen her love for me; but if it did she never showed it. She was always kind, always ready to sympathize with my troubles. There might have been peace and contentment in that humble home if it had not been for the demon Slavery.

He left the house in a fury. I looked at my grandmother, and our eyes met. The anger had gone from her eyes, but she looked sad and tired. She was tired of the constant conflict. I wondered why it did not lessen her love for me. But if it did, she never showed it. She was always kind and always ready to share my troubles. There might have been peace and contentment in that humble home if not for the demon Slavery.

The winter passed undisturbed by the doctor. The beautiful spring came; and when Nature resumes her loveliness, the human soul is apt to revive also. My drooping hopes came to life again with the flowers. I was dreaming of freedom again; more for my children’s sake than my own. I planned and I planned. Obstacles hit against plans. There seemed no way of overcoming them; and yet I hoped.

The winter passed without the doctor disturbing me. Beautiful spring came, and when nature becomes lovely again, the human spirit often revives too. My fading hopes came back to life with the flowers. I was dreaming of freedom again, more for my children’s sake than my own. I kept making plans, but obstacles stood in their way. There seemed to be no way around them, and yet I hoped.

Back came the wily doctor. I was not at home when he called. A friend had invited me to a small party, and to gratify her I went. To my great consternation, a messenger came in haste to say that Dr. Flint was at my grandmother’s, and insisted on seeing me. They did not tell him where I was, or he would have come and raised a disturbance in my friend’s house. They sent me a dark wrapper; I threw it on and hurried home. My speed did not save me; the doctor had gone away in anger. I dreaded the morning, but I could not delay it; it came, warm and bright. At an early hour the doctor came and asked me where I had been last night. I told him. He did not believe me, and sent to my friend’s house to ascertain the facts. He came in the afternoon to assure me he was satisfied that I had spoken the truth. He seemed to be in a facetious mood, and I expected some jeers were coming. “I suppose you need some recreation,” said he, “but I am surprised at your being there, among those negroes. It was not the place for you. Are you allowed to visit such people?”

The sly doctor came back. I was not home when he called. A friend had invited me to a small party, and I went to please her. To my great alarm, a messenger arrived in a hurry. Dr. Flint was at my grandmother’s house and insisted on seeing me. They did not tell him where I was. If they had, he would have come and caused a disturbance at my friend’s house. They sent me a dark cloak. I threw it on and hurried home, but I was not fast enough. The doctor had left in anger. I dreaded the morning, but I could not delay it. It came, warm and bright. Early that morning, the doctor came and asked me where I had been the night before. I told him. He did not believe me, so he sent someone to my friend’s house to check. That afternoon, he came to assure me that he was satisfied I had told the truth. He seemed to be in a joking mood, and I expected him to mock me. “I suppose you need some recreation,” he said, “but I am surprised you were there, among those negroes. It was not the place for you. Are you allowed to visit such people?”

I understood this covert fling at the white gentleman who was my friend; but I merely replied, “I went to visit my friends, and any company they keep is good enough for me.”

I understood the hidden insult aimed at my white friend. But I simply replied, “I went to visit my friends, and anyone they spend time with is good enough for me.”

He went on to say, “I have seen very little of you of late, but my interest in you is unchanged. When I said I would have no more mercy on you I was rash. I recall my words. Linda, you desire freedom for yourself and your children, and you can obtain it only through me. If you agree to what I am about to propose, you and they shall be free. There must be no communication of any kind between you and their father. I will procure a cottage, where you and the children can live together. Your labor shall be light, such as sewing for my family. Think what is offered you, Linda—a home and freedom! Let the past be forgotten. If I have been harsh with you at times, your wilfulness drove me to it. You know I exact obedience from my own children, and I consider you as yet a child.”

He went on to say, “I haven't seen much of you lately, but my interest in you hasn't changed. I was rash when I said I would show you no more mercy. I take those words back. Linda, you want freedom for yourself and your children, and only I can give it to you. If you agree to what I am about to propose, you and your children will be free. You must have no contact of any kind with their father. I will get a cottage where you and the children can live together. Your work will be light, such as sewing for my family. Think about what is being offered to you, Linda: a home and freedom! Let's forget the past. If I have been harsh with you at times, your stubbornness drove me to it. You know I demand obedience from my own children, and I still consider you a child.”

He paused for an answer, but I remained silent.

He paused for an answer, but I stayed silent.

“Why don’t you speak?” said he. “What more do you wait for?”

“Why don’t you speak?” he said. “What else are you waiting for?”

“Nothing, sir.”

“Nothing, sir.”

“Then you accept my offer?”

“So you accept my offer?”

“No, sir.”

“No, sir.”

His anger was ready to break loose; but he succeeded in curbing it, and replied, “You have answered without thought. But I must let you know there are two sides to my proposition; if you reject the bright side, you will be obliged to take the dark one. You must either accept my offer, or you and your children shall be sent to your young master’s plantation, there to remain till your young mistress is married; and your children shall fare like the rest of the negro children. I give you a week to consider of it.”

His anger was about to burst out, but he managed to control it. He replied, “You answered without thinking. But you must know that my offer has two sides. If you reject the bright side, you will have to take the dark one. You must either accept my offer, or you and your children will be sent to your young master’s plantation. You will stay there until your young mistress marries. Your children will be treated like the other enslaved Black children. I give you a week to think about it.”

He was shrewd; but I knew he was not to be trusted. I told him I was ready to give my answer now.

He was clever, but I knew I couldn't trust him. I told him I was ready to give my answer now.

“I will not receive it now,” he replied. “You act too much from impulse. Remember that you and your children can be free a week from to-day if you choose.”

“I won’t accept it now,” he replied. “You act too much on impulse. Remember, you and your children can be free in a week if you choose.”

On what a monstrous chance hung the destiny of my children! I knew that my master’s offer was a snare, and that if I entered it escape would be impossible. As for his promise, I knew him so well that I was sure if he gave me free papers, they would be so managed as to have no legal value. The alternative was inevitable. I resolved to go to the plantation. But then I thought how completely I should be in his power, and the prospect was appalling. Even if I should kneel before him, and implore him to spare me, for the sake of my children, I knew he would spurn me with his foot, and my weakness would be his triumph.

What a monstrous chance my children’s fate depended on! I knew my master’s offer was a trap. If I accepted it, escape would be impossible. As for his promise, I knew him well. I was sure that if he gave me free papers, he would arrange for them to have no legal value. I had no choice but to go to the plantation. But then I thought about how completely I would be in his power, and the thought terrified me. Even if I knelt before him and begged him to spare me for my children’s sake, I knew he would kick me away. My weakness would be his triumph.

Before the week expired, I heard that young Mr. Flint was about to be married to a lady of his own stamp. I foresaw the position I should occupy in his establishment. I had once been sent to the plantation for punishment, and fear of the son had induced the father to recall me very soon. My mind was made up; I was resolved that I would foil my master and save my children, or I would perish in the attempt. I kept my plans to myself; I knew that friends would try to dissuade me from them, and I would not wound their feelings by rejecting their advice.

Before the week was over, I heard that young Mr. Flint was about to marry a woman just like him. I could foresee what my position would be in his household. I had once been sent to the plantation as punishment. His father had soon called me back because he feared his son. My mind was made up. I was determined to defeat my master and save my children, or die trying. I kept my plans to myself. I knew my friends would try to talk me out of them. I did not want to hurt their feelings by rejecting their advice.

On the decisive day the doctor came, and said he hoped I had made a wise choice.

On the day of the decision, the doctor came and said he hoped I had made a wise choice.

“I am ready to go to the plantation, sir,” I replied.

“I’m ready to go to the plantation, sir,” I replied.

“Have you thought how important your decision is to your children?” said he.

“Have you thought about how important your decision is for your children?” he said.

I told him I had.

I told him I had.

“Very well. Go to the plantation, and my curse go with you,” he replied. “Your boy shall be put to work, and he shall soon be sold; and your girl shall be raised for the purpose of selling well. Go your own ways!” He left the room with curses, not to be repeated.

“Very well. Go to the plantation, and may my curse go with you,” he replied. “Your boy will be put to work, and he will soon be sold. Your girl will be raised to bring a good price when she is sold. Go your own way!” He left the room cursing in words too foul to repeat.

As I stood rooted to the spot, my grandmother came and said, “Linda, child, what did you tell him?”

As I stood frozen in place, my grandmother came over and said, “Linda, child, what did you tell him?”

I answered that I was going to the plantation.

I said I was going to the plantation.

“Must you go?” said she. “Can’t something be done to stop it?”

“Must you go?” she asked. “Can’t something be done to stop it?”

I told her it was useless to try; but she begged me not to give up. She said she would go to the doctor, and remind him how long and how faithfully she had served in the family, and how she had taken her own baby from her breast to nourish his wife. She would tell him I had been out of the family so long they would not miss me; that she would pay them for my time, and the money would procure a woman who had more strength for the situation than I had. I begged her not to go; but she persisted in saying, “He will listen to me, Linda.” She went, and was treated as I expected. He coolly listened to what she said, but denied her request. He told her that what he did was for my good, that my feelings were entirely above my situation, and that on the plantation I would receive treatment that was suitable to my behavior.

I told her there was no use trying, but she begged me not to give up. She said she would go to the doctor. She would remind him how long and faithfully she had served the family. She would remind him that she had taken her own baby from her breast to nurse his wife. She would tell him I had been away from the family so long that they would not miss me. She would pay them for my time. With that money, they could hire a woman who was stronger than I was for the work. I begged her not to go, but she kept saying, “He will listen to me, Linda.” She went, and he treated her as I expected. He listened to her calmly, but refused her request. He told her that what he did was for my own good. He said my feelings were far above my station in life. He also said that on the plantation I would be treated as my behavior deserved.

My grandmother was much cast down. I had my secret hopes; but I must fight my battle alone. I had a woman’s pride, and a mother’s love for my children; and I resolved that out of the darkness of this hour a brighter dawn should rise for them. My master had power and law on his side; I had a determined will. There is might in each.

My grandmother was deeply discouraged. I had my secret hopes, but I had to fight my battle alone. I had a woman’s pride and a mother’s love for my children. I resolved that a brighter dawn would rise for them out of the darkness of this hour. My master had power and the law on his side. I had a determined will. Both have strength.