Chapter 30

6 min

When they got aboard the king went for me, and shook me by the collar, and says:

When they got aboard, the king came at me and shook me by the collar. Then he says:

“Tryin’ to give us the slip, was ye, you pup! Tired of our company, hey?”

“Trying to give us the slip, was you, you pup! Tired of our company, hey?”

I says:

“No, your majesty, we warn’t—please don’t, your majesty!”

“No, your majesty, we weren’t. Please don’t, your majesty!”

“Quick, then, and tell us what was your idea, or I’ll shake the insides out o’ you!”

“Quick, then, tell us what your idea was, or I’ll shake the insides out of you!”

“Honest, I’ll tell you everything just as it happened, your majesty. The man that had a-holt of me was very good to me, and kept saying he had a boy about as big as me that died last year, and he was sorry to see a boy in such a dangerous fix; and when they was all took by surprise by finding the gold, and made a rush for the coffin, he lets go of me and whispers, ‘Heel it now, or they’ll hang ye, sure!’ and I lit out. It didn’t seem no good for me to stay—I couldn’t do nothing, and I didn’t want to be hung if I could get away. So I never stopped running till I found the canoe; and when I got here I told Jim to hurry, or they’d catch me and hang me yet, and said I was afeard you and the duke wasn’t alive now, and I was awful sorry, and so was Jim, and was awful glad when we see you coming; you may ask Jim if I didn’t.”

“Honest, I’ll tell you everything just as it happened, your majesty. The man that had hold of me was very good to me. He kept saying he had a boy about as big as me that died last year. And he was sorry to see a boy in such a dangerous fix. When they was all surprised by finding the gold, they rushed for the coffin. Then he lets go of me and whispers, ‘Run now, or they’ll hang you, sure!’ And I took off. It didn’t seem no good for me to stay. I couldn’t do nothing, and I didn’t want to be hung if I could get away. So I never stopped running till I found the canoe. And when I got here, I told Jim to hurry, or they’d catch me and hang me yet. I said I was afraid you and the duke wasn’t alive now. I was awful sorry, and so was Jim. And we was awful glad when we see you coming. You may ask Jim if I didn’t.”

Jim said it was so; and the king told him to shut up, and said, “Oh, yes, it’s mighty likely!” and shook me up again, and said he reckoned he’d drownd me. But the duke says:

Jim said it was so. And the king told him to shut up and said, “Oh, yes, it’s mighty likely!” Then he shook me again and said he reckoned he’d drown me. But the duke says:

“Leggo the boy, you old idiot! Would you a done any different? Did you inquire around for him when you got loose? I don’t remember it.”

“Let go of the boy, you old idiot! Would you have done any different? Did you ask around for him when you got loose? I don’t remember it.”

So the king let go of me, and begun to cuss that town and everybody in it. But the duke says:

So the king let go of me and begun to cuss that town and everybody in it. But the duke says:

“You better a blame sight give yourself a good cussing, for you’re the one that’s entitled to it most. You hain’t done a thing from the start that had any sense in it, except coming out so cool and cheeky with that imaginary blue-arrow mark. That was bright—it was right down bully; and it was the thing that saved us. For if it hadn’t been for that, they’d a jailed us till them Englishmen’s baggage come—and then—the penitentiary, you bet! But that trick took ’em to the graveyard, and the gold done us a still bigger kindness; for if the excited fools hadn’t let go all holts and made that rush to get a look, we’d a slept in our cravats to-night—cravats warranted to wear, too—longer than we’d need ’em.”

“You better give yourself a good cussing, by a blame sight, because you’re the one that deserves it most. You ain’t done a thing from the start that made any sense. Except coming out so cool and cheeky with that imaginary blue-arrow mark. That was clever. It was downright great, and it was what saved us. For if it hadn’t been for that trick, they’d have jailed us till those Englishmen’s baggage came. And then it would have been prison, you bet! But that trick took them to the graveyard, and the gold did us an even bigger favor. For if those excited fools hadn’t let go of us and rushed to get a look, we’d have slept in our neckties tonight. Neckties guaranteed to wear well, too, longer than we’d need them.”

They was still a minute—thinking; then the king says, kind of absent-minded like:

They was quiet for a minute, thinking. Then the king says, kind of absent-minded like:

“Mf! And we reckoned the stole it!”

“Hmph! And we reckoned the stole it!”

That made me squirm!

“Yes,” says the duke, kinder slow and deliberate and sarcastic, “We did.”

“Yes,” says the duke, kind of slow and deliberate and sarcastic, “We did.”

After about a half a minute the king drawls out:

After about half a minute, the king drawls:

“Leastways, I did.”

“At least, I did.”

The duke says, the same way:

The duke says in the same way:

“On the contrary, I did.”

“Actually, I did.”

The king kind of ruffles up, and says:

The king kind of bristles and says:

“Looky here, Bilgewater, what’r you referrin’ to?”

“Look here, Bilgewater, what are you referring to?”

The duke says, pretty brisk:

“When it comes to that, maybe you’ll let me ask, what was you referring to?”

“In that case, maybe you’ll let me ask, what was you referring to?”

“Shucks!” says the king, very sarcastic; “but I don’t know—maybe you was asleep, and didn’t know what you was about.”

“Shucks!” says the king, very sarcastic. “But I don’t know. Maybe you was asleep and didn’t know what you was doing.”

The duke bristles up now, and says:

The duke gets angry now and says:

“Oh, let up on this cussed nonsense; do you take me for a blame’ fool? Don’t you reckon I know who hid that money in that coffin?”

“Oh, let up on this cussed nonsense. Do you take me for a blamed fool? Don’t you reckon I know who hid that money in that coffin?”

“Yes, sir! I know you do know, because you done it yourself!”

“It’s a lie!”—and the duke went for him. The king sings out:

“It’s a lie!” And the duke lunged at him. The king shouts:

“Take y’r hands off!—leggo my throat!—I take it all back!”

“Take your hands off! Let go of my throat! I take it all back!”

The duke says:

“Well, you just own up, first, that you did hide that money there, intending to give me the slip one of these days, and come back and dig it up, and have it all to yourself.”

“Well, first just admit that you did hide that money there. You planned to sneak away from me one day, then come back and dig it up. You wanted to keep it all for yourself.”

“Wait jest a minute, duke—answer me this one question, honest and fair; if you didn’t put the money there, say it, and I’ll b’lieve you, and take back everything I said.”

“Wait just a minute, duke. Answer me this one question, honest and fair. If you didn’t put the money there, say so, and I’ll believe you and take back everything I said.”

“You old scoundrel, I didn’t, and you know I didn’t. There, now!”

“Well, then, I b’lieve you. But answer me only jest this one more—now don’t git mad; didn’t you have it in your mind to hook the money and hide it?”

“Well, then, I believe you. But answer me just this one more question. Now don’t get mad. Didn’t you mean to steal the money and hide it?”

The duke never said nothing for a little bit; then he says:

The duke never said nothing for a little bit. Then he says:

“Well, I don’t care if I did, I didn’t do it, anyway. But you not only had it in mind to do it, but you done it.”

“Well, I don’t care if I did. I didn’t do it, anyway. But you not only planned to do it, you done it.”

“I wisht I never die if I done it, duke, and that’s honest. I won’t say I warn’t goin’ to do it, because I was; but you—I mean somebody—got in ahead o’ me.”

“I wish I never die if I done it, duke, and that’s honest. I won’t say I wasn’t going to do it, because I was. But you, I mean somebody, got in ahead of me.”

“It’s a lie! You done it, and you got to say you done it, or—”

“It’s a lie! You done it, and you got to say you done it, or...”

The king began to gurgle, and then he gasps out:

The king started to gurgle, and then he gasps out:

“’Nough!—I own up!”

“Enough! I own up!”

I was very glad to hear him say that; it made me feel much more easier than what I was feeling before. So the duke took his hands off and says:

I was very glad to hear him say that. It made me feel much more easier than what I was feeling before. So the duke took his hands off and says:

“If you ever deny it again I’ll drown you. It’s well for you to set there and blubber like a baby—it’s fitten for you, after the way you’ve acted. I never see such an old ostrich for wanting to gobble everything—and I a-trusting you all the time, like you was my own father. You ought to been ashamed of yourself to stand by and hear it saddled on to a lot of poor , and you never say a word for ’em. It makes me feel ridiculous to think I was soft enough to believe that rubbage. Cuss you, I can see now why you was so anxious to make up the deffisit—you wanted to get what money I’d got out of the Nonesuch and one thing or another, and scoop it all!”

“If you ever deny it again I’ll drown you. It’s well for you to set there and blubber like a baby. It’s fitting for you, after the way you’ve acted. I never see such an old ostrich for wanting to gobble everything, and me a-trusting you all the time, like you was my own father. You ought to been ashamed of yourself to stand by and hear it pinned on a lot of poor , and you never say a word for ’em. It makes me feel ridiculous to think I was soft enough to believe that rubbish. Cuss you, I can see now why you was so anxious to make up the deffisit: you wanted to get what money I’d got out of the Nonesuch and one thing or another, and scoop it all!”

The king says, timid, and still a-snuffling:

The king says, timid and still sniffling:

“Why, duke, it was you that said make up the deffisit; it warn’t me.”

“Why, duke, it was you that said make up the deficit. It wasn’t me.”

“Dry up! I don’t want to hear no more out of you!” says the duke. “And now you see what you got by it. They’ve got all their own money back, and all of ourn but a shekel or two besides. G’long to bed, and don’t you deffersit me no more deffersits, long ’s you live!”

“Shut up! I don’t want to hear no more out of you!” says the duke. “And now you see what you got out of it. They’ve got all their own money back, and all of ours but a coin or two besides. Go on to bed, and don’t you deffersit me no more deffersits, as long as you live!”

So the king sneaked into the wigwam and took to his bottle for comfort, and before long the duke tackled his bottle; and so in about a half an hour they was as thick as thieves again, and the tighter they got, the lovinger they got, and went off a-snoring in each other’s arms. They both got powerful mellow, but I noticed the king didn’t get mellow enough to forget to remember to not deny about hiding the money-bag again. That made me feel easy and satisfied. Of course when they got to snoring we had a long gabble, and I told Jim everything.

So the king sneaked into the wigwam and took to his bottle for comfort, and before long the duke tackled his bottle. And so in about half an hour they was as thick as thieves again, and the tighter they got, the lovinger they got, and they went off a-snoring in each other’s arms. They both got powerful mellow, but I noticed the king didn’t get mellow enough to forget to remember to not deny about hiding the money-bag again. That made me feel easy and satisfied. Of course, when they got to snoring we had a long gabble, and I told Jim everything.